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Most temples offer the parents of the Bat Mitzvah girl or Bar Mitzvah boy an opportunity to share some words of wisdom. Even if you are the best contemporaneous speaker on earth, I would still recommend jotting down your thoughts. I have attended hundreds of B’nai Mitzvot and have never, ever seen a parent speak who was not feeling intensely emotional at the moment. If you take no other advice from PartyIdeaPros.com, please give yourself plenty of time to mull over what you would like to say to your child and write it down!
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After many requests for sample speeches we are beginning to compile the best of the best. If you would like to help out other parents who searching for inspiration, please submit your speech to partyideapros@gmail.com for consideration. We will publish the best of the best!
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Sample 1
Your child’s name-
When we began this journey, we viewed today as an individual rite of passage — a celebration of your birthday, the legal age in which you assume a role of responsibility in the Jewish community, and a celebration of your hard work and your efforts, and especially all of your enormous accomplishments. But with time, it became clear that this celebration is really much larger than just that – for mom and me, it is about trust in G-d.
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At first we wondered, why this Torah portion. The answer … maybe it’s meant to be. Mom would say, “it’s b’shert.” As you well know, and will discuss later this morning, this week’s Torah portion is from Leviticus, the rulebook of the Torah. And although Leviticus lacks the great stories of Genesis and Exodus, those who know you well and understand you, would probably agree that this is your book. It provides structure and purpose to life’s vagaries. It elevates events of daily life to a higher moral ground. You do best when life is unambiguous – You like clarity and lucidity. The clearer the rules the better. You welcome and find merit in ritual and easily appreciate the Torah’s bigger lessons. We proudly watched as you grew to understand just how valuable the weekly parsha, even this seemingly archaic portion, could be in your daily life. We hope that you will continue your studies and will continue to turn to the Torah throughout your life, for the sheer joy of study, for answers and for questions and mostly, for hope.
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Today, in this temple, a house of worship and ritual, you join them. It is your turn to be encircled by family, friends and community – some of whom have never even met you, and yet were willing to make the effort to be here with us. We are all here to witness and celebrate with you, as you represent our trust in G-d, our hopes, our dreams. You are the promise. We watch you embracing the torah, the cornerstone of our faith, with joy and comfort, knowing that you will strive to live by the values it teaches.
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The Torah is the authority that guides our choices in life. You will have many choices in your life. We have come to trust your judgment and your choices. But throughout your life you will be thrown curveballs, unexpected events happen. Remember that Leviticus and its rules is just 1/5th of the Torah, much of the Torah is about life unfolding and learning how our ancestors dealt with the life’s challenges, sometimes successfully and sometimes not. We want you to know that Mom and I will always be here for you as your life unfolds.
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We also want you to know that family and friends are here for you too. Your child’s name, may you endeavor to be a good person. Remember that all G-d really requires from you is your just actions. It really is pretty black and white – it’s about mitzvot, it’s about your deeds.
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It is about respect for and pride in your heritage, and living an ethical, balanced life with honor, integrity, and laughter.
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May you learn from those that came before you and from the example of those around you today. May you wear our dreams as comfortably as you wear your tallit and carry on our hopes, and may you, too, always trust to G-d.
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We love you forever.
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Sample 2
Your child’s name, in your Torah portion, Moses says, “Dedicate yourselves to the Lord this day … that he may bestow a blessing upon you today.” And here we stand. You, like your Mom and I before you, and your grandparents before us and their parents before them, dedicating yourself to G-d. Looking out we can see just how blessed you are, surrounded by friends and family who love you and are here to support you. Know Mom and I will also always be here whenever you need us and even sometimes when you don’t think you need us. But today, we are all here to witness your commitment to G-d and the Jewish people and to celebrate with you. We watch you, embracing the Torah, the cornerstone of our faith, with joy and comfort, knowing that you will strive to live by the values it teaches.
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From the day you were born, we intuitively knew you were especially blessed by G-d. And we were right. You have so many talents `… you are bright, you are creative, you are funny, you are athletic and you are a natural leader. We hope you recognize, celebrate and cherish these blessings as gifts from G-d to be used wisely and responsibly. Look to the Torah as inspiration and guidance as you face the daily joys and challenges of your life.
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We know you love a good story and are drawn to the larger than life epics which unfold in the books of Genesis and Exodus. Embrace not only the stories, but also their lessons. Emulate the mighty intellect and conviction of Moses. Nurture the compassion and leadership skills of Aaron. And in these times of doubt and turmoil, adopt your ancestors trust in G-d. As your life unfolds, we hope you will more and more learn to value the other books in the Bible, too … yes, even the books dealing with the laws and rules. The Torah is the authority that guides our choices in life. The Torah teaches both balance and structure.
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We hope you turn to G-d and the Torah to find that balance and to create structure in your own life, for you will need both to fulfill the promise in you, to find the holiness within and to appreciate, cultivate and celebrate the very special blessings G-d has bestowed upon you.
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Not only do you have the writings and teachings of the Torah to turn to for guidance, you are encircled by family and friends who, too, have dedicated themselves to G-d: striving to live ethical, balanced lives with honor, integrity and laughter. You are surrounded by loved ones who are what Nanna and Bubbe, might call mentsches. You are blessed to have such wonderful role models.
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And your child’s name, no boy called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah, could have better role models than your grandfathers. Both are professionally accomplished and successful. Both Grandpa and Popol are cherished by those whose lives they have touched. They are respected for their warmth, their dignity, their intellect, their virtue, and yes, their humor. And equally important, both are committed to the teachings of the Torah. They have devoted hours and hours to ‘Tikum Olam,” or repairing the world, and to doing “Mitzvoth” or good deeds. They know that if you endeavor to be a good person, life is much more simple. They understand that all G-d really requires from you is your just actions. So your child’s name, remember, it’s about mitzvoth, it’s about your deeds; it’s about the choices you make. You are so very blessed to have wise and loving grandparents. Emulate them!
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As you know, Granny and Grandpa wanted to be here with you to witness you being called to the Torah as a Bar Mitzvah. They wanted nothing more than to be able to pass the Torah to still another generation and have expressed to you their pride in your accomplishments and joy in your acceptance of the responsibility of Jewish manhood. Tonight they will rejoice with us. Grandpa even sent you an email saying, “We plan to have a special bottle of champagne to celebrate on the east coast.” Once again, Grandpa gently guides us all, with grace and fortitude. He knows the Torah teaches us to serve G-d with joy. Performance of mitzvoth is to be celebrated!
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Your child’s name, we are so very blessed to have you as our son. May you learn from those that came before you and from the example of those around you today. May you wear our dreams as comfortably as you wear your tallit and carry on our hopes.
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May you constantly re-dedicate yourself to G-d and may G-d continue to bestow blessings upon you. We wish for you, our family, friends, our country and Israel, the words inscribed upon your tallit: “Sim Shalom Tovah Uvracha …” “May G-d give peace, goodness, and blessing…”
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We love you, yes we do!
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Sample 3
Our Dearest your child’s name,
Poppy from Chicago had a dream that his family would make a pilgrimage to Israel, together. At every Seder, every birthday, ok, all holidays, he would passionately, declare, “Next year in Jerusalem.”
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Dreaming of a pilgrimage to Israel means different things to different people. Some of us are primarily interested in the vast array of historically significant sites, and for others the awe-inspiring beauty of the countryside is enough, but for many Jews, a pilgrimage to Israel is also a spiritual journey, for some, a search for spiritual peace. Rabbi Aaron Moss explains: “Jerusalem means ‘the city of peace’ – a place of peace between body and soul, heaven and earth, ideal and reality. When our body becomes not a prison for the soul but rather a vehicle for the soul’s expression; when we live our lives according to our ideals rather than our cravings; when the world values goodness and generosity over selfish gain, then we are in Jerusalem, we are at peace with ourselves and the world.” This is the dream. You, your child’s name, personify this dream. You are blessed with the gift of serenity: your family and friends appreciate your diplomacy and quiet calm, and horses respond to your touch. This is why, your child’s name, our little Yitzchaka, she who laughs (and yes, you laugh often and easily), Poppy’s namesake, it is even more fitting that it is you, a young lady of integrity, poise, generosity and serenity who has made his dream, “Next Year in Jerusalem” a reality.
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As we stand here, your relatives and congregational family, on this special day, celebrating your becoming a Bat Mitzvah, in the land of our ancestors, it is important to remember those who came before us, who we cherish and who we respect. Your grandparents and their parents and their parents before them embraced a strong, enduring belief and trust in G-d. They accepted the responsibilities of the special covenant between G-d and the Jewish people, living their lives with honor and integrity. They performed mitzvoth and tikkun olam. They had dreams. They had hopes. They created traditions. They guided us, schooled us and modeled Jewish values, and as commanded, passed them on from generation to generation.
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Now your child’s name it is your turn. We watched you embracing the Torah, the cornerstone of our faith, with joy and comfort, knowing that you will strive to live by the values it teaches. We are all here to witness and celebrate with you, as you represent our trust in G-d, our hopes, our dreams. You are the promise.
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As you were preparing for your D’var Torah, Rabbi _______ posed to you a few questions to ponder. Some of the questions were easy, factual questions, but some required more thought. He asked you to think abstractly and philosophically about topics that probably have never even crossed your mind. We hope you continue to ponder, to think about matters of consequence, of meaning beyond the everyday minutia. Torah will help guide you in thinking about these issues. It will make your life richer and give you moral direction.
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Your child’s name, think about Torah as the authority that guides our choices in life. We hope you turn to it as you face your own choices. We have come to trust your judgment and your decisions. Nevertheless, throughout your life unexpected things will happen. Some days you will ride beautifully, other days you will be thrown off your horse, and at least once in your life, your horse will just plain refuse to move – just like in your parasha. Much of the Torah is about life unfolding and learning how our ancestors dealt with life’s challenges, sometimes successfully and sometimes not. your child’s name, please know that Mom and I will always be here for you as your life unfolds. And, that family, friends, and clergy are here for you too.
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Your child’s name, remember the lesson of your Haftorah: that all G-d really requires from you is to do justice, love goodness, and walk humbly with your G-d.
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May you absorb the years of history, knowledge, and wisdom this amazing land has to offer, learn from those that came before you and from the example of those around you today. May you wear our dreams as comfortably as you wear your tallit and carry on our hopes, and may every year be in Jerusalem!
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We love you, yes we do, do, do, do doooooooooooooo!
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Party Hearty!
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